When it comes to making plans about where we're headed in life, some of us can clearly put together the end goal, achievement or business idea and just go for it. It's simple, when you know where you want to go you just take the steps to get you there. But there are others out there who can barely see one step ahead at a time.
I'm most definitely the second. Trying to see further than that causes so much anxiety and self-doubt. If only I knew exactly what I was trying to achieve, then it would all be so much more straightforward! And as someone who wants to be an entrepreneur and freelancer, I've spent so much time trying to force out the perfect plan so that I could just start working away at the steps to get there. But in all honestly, all of that "perfect planning" isn't getting me anywhere.
So I finally realised that I just don't operate that way. HALLELUJAH! And when I think about, I never really have in life. Now, I understand why having a solid plan is beneficial, some may even say crucial. But forcing that upon myself is so unnatural to me. I thought my inability to pick a direction and GO, was because of a fear of commitment and not making the right choice. But I'm starting to learn that what works best for me at this stage, is more about constantly throwing things out into the universe and looking for what feels like the next right step to take.
If you're a successful business owner or a numbers guy or gal, you might be reading this thinking that this is the worst advice you've ever read. But for me, trying to force my future into a set outcome has proven to be impossible and soul destroying. The number of plans I've had that have just ended in tears when I realise I'm trying to force something rather than let it grow from the heart.
Well if you struggle with this as well, let me share with you how things have been unfolding.
Although I've really struggled with direction for the past four months, I have continued to throw myself out into this big world. I am always trying to (actually) connect with other food people (and meeting some pretty awesome new friends like Cashew Kitchen), applying for jobs that are related to food & nutrition, submitting proposals and following up with everything until the road ends. I keep a poster sized paper on my wall with all of the potential avenues written down, so that I'm constantly reminded where to keep chasing. I don't know exactly what it is that I'm trying to stand for or what my specific message necessarily is, but I know my general interest is food, nutrition & life.
From reading my last blog post you may know that I was so excited to get an interview for an internship with a cooking magazine. Unfortunately I felt pretty down when it didn't work out because I can't write & edit in Swedish (yet!).
But I was also really excited for a meeting with a startup healthy eating app called Phoodster. A few weeks later, and I have just signed a contract with them to create & photograph recipes. I am also taking on the task of translating the recipes to Swedish, so maybe I'll be writing in Swedish sooner than I think!
This is the thing: I couldn't have predicted that this is what I would do next. But I am beyond excited about getting started for real and getting to do work that I really enjoy. You don't know who you're going to meet and where opportunities are going to pop up. If you're the type of person who just can't seem to pick & GO, just keep throwing yourself out there until you find your next right step. And then keep going, keep throwing, keep looking.
Oh yeah, and I started working in a restaurant a few evenings a week. Keeping yourself busy with a little cash in the bank helps a lot. I got that job with huge thanks to my mentor Herman from Startup Stockholm.
So The Glorious Kitchen has it's first freelance job. YES!
And in terms of what I want to stand for as a Holistic Nutritionist. There is a lot to learn. I can't necessarily know what is most important to me straight after graduating. But by chance, I did end up discovering a lot this summer. My acne has substantially cleared up, my hormones are more balanced and my mental wellbeing has most definitely improved. Many elements have come together helping me work towards balance, but from a nutrition perspective, I strongly believe healthy fats play a crucial role. This is a topic I'm going to talk a lot about, in the meantime here's a recipe for my Turmeric Latte for Acne.
What I want you to know is, really just keep trying. You don't have to know where you're going. The next right step will appear (in it's own time), so just have a little faith, be confident in yourself, hold on to the desire to learn & grown and keep believing that there might be a little bit of magic out there.
Shan x x